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Receiving Unsolicited Advice On Parenting

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Dot

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I am getting real frustrated and annoyed lately. Since seperating from my husband, I have noticed a trend from well meaning relatives to offer unsolicited advice on raising my son. I need to put a stop to it because it's starting to tick me off to no end.

I need some ideas, because I am afraid I am going to blow up and say some pretty innapropriate things.
 
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Next time someone does it, why don't you just say, "Thanks, but I can take care of myself and my child." You don't have to be bold, just be sharp and show it's unwanted.

And if you've done that, just tell them not to do it. You don't have to blow a gasket, just say that you don't like it.
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Is this one person or a group?
You have to be careful and tactful as to how you responde. Please don't respond in anger because it will make it so much worse. You don't want to be rude as when you need help and advice they may not want to help or be smug. On the other hand they need to understand that you need to learn as your son grows and if you need help and advice you will call on them .
 
It is one person. My busybody aunt. And this has only started since I have become seperated from my husband. Joey is adjusting pretty good to the sepeartion for the most part, but I tread carefully because I want to ensure that what I do/say is in his best interest.

Here is an example. I haven't talked much to Joey about starting a new school because the school I wish to enroll him in (around the corner) may not take him because he is not Catholic. So I don't want to get him all gung ho about going to that school untill I am sure he will be attending it. (I will find out on Monday) Joey wants to go to his old school, with his old friends, which is not possible because we moved.

My aunt was over visiting my mom while I was at work and told him that he must go to that school. I found later that she had him in tears over that. Then Thursday night (at another uncle's house) she kept hammering at me over the same thing. And "why does Joey not want to do things that her grandkids do, like play baseball or dance". "He needs to do kid things".

blah blah blah bugger off you old hag.

Well he does do kid things, but things that he likes to do not things that others tell him he should like. I am a pretty lenient mom, I have never forced him to do anything he has no interest in. Don't get me wrong, when he joined soccer last year and he didn't really like it I made sure he finished the season, I didn't let him quit. But like he said to me he wants to take karate, not baseball.

I walked away, because my mommy lion instincts are in full swing right now. However, I don't want anybody to get the misconception that I will allow them to walk over me or Joey.
 
Ok, if she has him in tears you really need to be stern. Just call her up and tell her to cut it out, she's upsetting Joey and she needs to just shut up.
 
I hope things are better now Dotty dear. If I was you I would let that person say what they have to say and then carry on in my own way regardless. In other words in one ear amd out the other! That way you don't have an argument and your Aunt will feel like she has said her bit. Secondly, there may come a time when you need her help.

I don't think people intend to cause annoyance and mostly the advice is harmless. It's just that everyone else when it comes to pregnancy and children know better than you.
 
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