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Long Distance Worries..

bethanyparkin

bethanyparkin

Member
Joined
Jun 20, 2011
Messages
243
Location
Leeds
Later this year my boyfriend of 16months will be going to University away from home, it's not that far away but we wouldn't be able to see each other very often.
I'm worried that it won't work - is there anything to do to try and keep a relationship strong over long distances?
I'm willing to visit every other weekend, as I find it really hard not to see him because I really miss him. I also worry about other girls, as there's always someone prettier, smarter, nicer etc. And I'm scared he'll leave me.
Is there anything I can do? I keep worrying and I really don't want to lose him :(
 
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I can tell you from experience (i'm going through the exact same right now) that worrying about what he is doing is of no benefit to you. You are right, no matter how much you love each other, there will always be someone who is prettier, smarter, etc than you. The same goes for him, as well. If the love you both share is strong, then there is no doubt that your relationship will last. Distance will not be an issue. If you both share a deep soul connection, beyond the physical, then that bond cannot be broken. In fact, the distance may very well increase that bond... :)
 
jasminecorday26 said:
I can tell you from experience (i'm going through the exact same right now) that worrying about what he is doing is of no benefit to you. You are right, no matter how much you love each other, there will always be someone who is prettier, smarter, etc than you. The same goes for him, as well. If the love you both share is strong, then there is no doubt that your relationship will last. Distance will not be an issue. If you both share a deep soul connection, beyond the physical, then that bond cannot be broken. In fact, the distance may very well increase that bond... :)
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:) Awh I'm quite glad, I just was terrified to lose him, really am. I know I want me and him to last but I'm just really worried about other girls as well as growing apart. I wish there was something I could do so that we'd definitely last.
 
Well, there are things that you can do...
The first thing is to shift your focus, which would require you to stop worrying :) . Think about the relationship working out, know in your heart that the relationship WILL work out, and that what you both have is stronger than any doubts that you may possess. Communicate with each other as much as you can (phone calls, texts, letters, emails). Visit each other whenever time and travel permits. Be dedicated and loyal both him, and the relationship. Make sure that he is always aware of how much you love him. Keep it honest, and ask him to do the same. A long distance relationship can never work without honesty.
 
Hi beth, is he your first boyfriend? I guess it all boils down to how you guys deeply trust each other. Distance may affect your relationship, but not so much as for you guys to break up, especially if you do love each other truly.
 
beingwell said:
Hi beth, is he your first boyfriend? I guess it all boils down to how you guys deeply trust each other. Distance may affect your relationship, but not so much as for you guys to break up, especially if you do love each other truly.
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He's my second boyfriend, but my first was such a mistake, I was too young and stupid and it just wasn't right in any way.
He's the first boy I've ever loved, I really don't wanna lose him, we've had trust issues in the past but it's fine now so I'm unsure if we'll work out or not, I'm really hoping for, pushing it here - but forever. You know when you wanna spend the rest of your life with someone? Well he's the one for me. I just don't want the distance to make us break up :/
 
Just trust him and don't ask him every second whatever he does. Make him feel that you are openminded and faithful too and you trust him enough and for sure, he'll give back the merits to you.
 
You could use the online chat to be able to communicate with him almost everyday. It is not necessary going to him physically in regular basis to be able to show your love for him. You could visit him maybe sometime if he was not busy on his studies. You could interfere on his studies if you do visit him everyday and maybe it could just annoy him. Learn to trust him. And as i said, there is online chat, you could use camera to see each other. And also there is cell phone. :)
 
In a distance relationship Trust, Faithfulness and Communication are very important. Both of you already knew that you love each other. Every relationship will be tested with Time, distance and any kind of circumstances. And your boyfriend being off to the university will be a test of distance. I understand how you feel and that is normal. Just trust him and his love for you. You said, you will visit him every other week and that's good. If you relationship built on love and trust nothing to worry about. Just keep communicating with him always. Since, he is in school try to understand him if he is busy doing some projects or any school activities but then the support must be always there. Just trust him and everything will be fine. God bless.
 
bethanyparkin said:
Thanks so much for all your advice, just need to put it to the test in a few months, wish me luck.
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Okay. Good luck and God bless..You will be fine. Actually, I am far from my husband a thousand miles away for almost 2 years now. :)
 
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I feel like the main thing that has to be said here is if you two are meant to be together, it shouldn't matter whether he lives 5 minutes away or 5 hours away or 5 countries away. Things have a funny way of playing out the way they're supposed to so I say just leave it to fate. Also, if your boyfriend is serious then he would not be worried about all these other females around him and keep his focus on you and keeping your relationship strong.
 
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