Establishing boundaries of discipline

[digitalbrew]

So, I am the current care taker of my nieces. Often times, they are such sweet kids with loving personalities. However, there are just this instances that you get to see how lazy/spoiled they are- making a mess of their stuff and not putting it back, having the help (who is much smaller and thinner than them) carry their bags upstairs, ordering the help to do this and that which they are very well capable of doing.

Unfortunately, I am not their mom so I'm always hesitant on whether to interfere and correct them or not. My sister gets full of it sometimes that she will get angry at them for not listening to her as well. And this makes me feel guilty for not doing my part as an aunt. They can sometimes test my patience and I have to correct their bad behavior. As they are growing, it's becoming more difficult for me to know when to stop disciplining them.

Have you ever been caught in such a situation? How do you do it? How do you know when enough is enough?

 

[feminista]

This sounds like such a difficult situation. You should definitely have a chat with their mother first, to see how she disciplines her kids. However, if you're their caretaker, I think you're fully within your rights to discipline them. If you're looking after them, then that comes with setting rules.

I think perhaps you should leave them on their own for awhile with chores, or get them to do chores as a punishment. Like, they should be in charge of cleaning their own spaces, with consequences if it isn't done. Also, having them fend for themselves (prepping food, cleaning, etc) should be a valuable lesson in responsibility, not to mention teaching them to take care of themselves in the future.

 

[Parker]

Sometimes I watch by 10 years old niece. She is really a darling, but she is also very spoiled. When I watch her, I make sure sure she cleans up after herself. I also don't allow her to watch television shows that aren't age appropriate. Apparently, my brother allows her to watch all kinds of crazy stuff. She's old enough to understand to pick up on two sets of rules. She behaves herself around me. I talked to her parents about it. If she can't follow my rules, then someone else will have to watch her.